WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU LAND

Fiumicino Airport, Rome, Italy

1. Men with machine guns walking around the airport.

2. The beautiful white noise of language soup.

3. Lines in the bathroom.

4. Cigarette smoke, everywhere.

5. A half-hour wait for your luggage.

6. Body odor, lots of it.

7. Lines in customs.

8. Lines in passport control.

9. Nuns in habits.

10. Lines at the bar (where you buy your caffè latte).